As we have entered into 2025, I know that many people have a tendency to set goals for the New Year. This can often be a time where we feel incredibly motivated to make changes in our life and we feel optimistic about achieving our goals. At the same time, it can be overwhelming and disappointing when we set goals that we don’t achieve and for many this is often the case. That is why I think it’s important to think about how we’re approaching goal-setting.
Goal-setting can also be a powerful tool for personal growth and many of us have things that we want to improve or change in our lives. However, it's important to approach goal-setting with care because, while achieving our goals can boost our mood, not meeting our goals or somehow falling short of expectations negatively impacts our mental health. Healthy goals are those that are realistic, compassionate, and aligned with our current capacity. When set mindfully, goals can boost self-esteem and improve overall mental health - but how do we set healthy goals? See my tips below:
1. Make Goals Specific and Achievable
One of the most important aspects of setting healthy goals is ensuring they are both specific and achievable. Vague goals like “I want to feel better” or “I want to be happier” are well-intentioned but often too broad and unclear. Instead, we want to break our goal down into smaller, concrete actions. For example, if your overall goal is to improve your mood, a more specific goal might be: “I will take a 20-minute walk three times this week,” or “I will practice mindfulness for 5 minutes every day.”
Achieving smaller, realistic goals creates a sense of progress and accomplishment, which can build momentum for further positive changes. This is especially important to keep in mind as motivation can play a huge role in being able to achieve what we set out to do.
2. Focus on the Process, Not Just the Outcome
While it’s natural to be driven by outcomes, it’s important to remember that the process is just as crucial. Goals tied exclusively to end results can lead to frustration if you don’t immediately see the fruits of your labour. Instead, aim to set process-oriented goals that focus on how you want to feel or the steps you want to take, rather than just the outcome.
How might you know that you are making progress towards your goal? Reflect on this as you define the actions you take and have moments to check in with yourself. For example, If your goal is to get more movement into your daily routine, rather than focusing on the amount of time or the number of times you engage in movement, try to notice how you feel while walking. Do you feel that your breathing is less laboured over time? Do you notice any changes in your body e.g. a feeling of lightness or ease as you move? These might be indicators that you are making progress despite the fact that you may not have achieved the outcome just yet.
3. Ensure Goals Are Flexible
Life doesn’t always go according to plan, and that’s okay. It’s important to set goals with a degree of flexibility to account for the unexpected. Rigid goals can exacerbate stress and feelings of failure if things don’t go exactly as planned. Instead, create goals that leave room for adjustment and continue to check in to see if the goal you set for yourself is realistic given what you have going on. For example, if you have a lot of plans to go out and socialise one week but this takes away time from your goal of reading three times a week, maybe for that week you can reduce the number of times to once a week or set a number of pages as the goal instead.
Flexibility ensures that your goals remain supportive rather than overwhelming.
4. Be Kind to Yourself
Many of us have negative narratives about ourselves and this can especially be prevalent when it comes to goal-setting and making changes. Be mindful of your inner dialogue as you go through the goal-setting process. It’s easy to fall into self-criticism if you slip up or don’t meet expectations right away. This is where self-compassion will be a vital tool to setting and achieving healthy goals.
Conclusion
Goal-setting can be incredibly positive and transformative, but it requires a mindful, realistic and compassionate approach. By setting clear but flexible goals, you can make progress toward the life you want while also nurturing your emotional and psychological well-being. Remember, it’s not about perfection—it’s about the journey!
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